Cecilia Kwarta

Cecilia V. Kwarta (Brudzisz)

Tuesday, November 2nd, 1937 - Tuesday, March 31st, 2020
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Obituary

Kwarta, Cecilia V. (Brudzisz)
Gates: Tuesday, March 31, 2020, at age 82. Predeceased by her husband, Robert F. Kwarta. She is survived by her children, Robert Jr. (Diane) Kwarta of PA, Brian (Michelle) Kwarta, Kathy (Fran) Reinecker of NC; grandchildren, John Kwarta, Mary (Devon) Shaffer, Joseph (Emily) Kwarta, Bethany, Bradley and Brielle Kwarta; great grandchildren, Benjamin and Kaiden Shaffer; brother-in-law and sister-in-law, Donald and Linda Kwarta; many nieces and nephews. She was a loving wife, mother and Babcia (grandmother), and was an active member at St. Theodore’s Church for 56 years.
Services and interment will be privately held. Those wishing, donations may be directed to Lifetime Assistance, Inc., 425 Paul Rd., Rochester, NY 14624 or to WXXI (wxxi.org). in her memory.
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Service Details

  • Interment

    Location
    Private
    Address
    ROCHESTER, NY

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Fran Reinecker

Posted at 02:49pm
I often told her that she was my favorite mother-in-law. Then I had to remind her that I was her favorite (and only) son-in-law. At least from my perspective, she would have been my favorite mother in law if I had dozens of mothers-in-law. As I've learned from the many people she touched in this life, she was someone different to all of us. However, with everyone, she was such a nice lady. Extremely quirky, with a bit "good" crazy, but always a genuinely nice and selfless human being. I'm going to miss you Waldo.
K

Kathy

Posted at 12:33pm
Mom, Happy Easter! Oh, how you(and Dad) loved Easter. I lovingly recall you and Dad joyously playing Halleileigh on your tape recorder. The spirituality of this day touched you deeply and you couldn't have picked a more appropriate time to return home!

While I miss you deeply, I know you are happy and that's comforting. I don't look forward to getting back to "normal" and thinking of those days that I can't call you. I miss our talks, our laughs, hugs and our special moments but they are locked in my heart and mind forever.

Love you Mommy...say hi to Pop from me and to everyone else.

LB

Love, Bobby

Posted at 11:58pm
Mom, you were the ultimate conservationist. May this tree nourish our air as your love nourished and sustained us in life.
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A memorial tree was planted in the memory of Cecilia Kwarta
RJ

Robert (Bobby) Kwarta Jr

Posted at 11:43pm
The main purpose for sharing this memory is to describe a dream (or revelation) that I experienced during my first night's sleep after Mom had passed away. I believe that this vision was provided to me through the Mercy of God's infinite love, in order to comfort me and give me the strength and peace needed to cope with this unexpected, sudden, and heartbreaking loss. This was indeed accomplished, since I have been at peace ever since. Of course, much sadness remains in losing a loving Mother who skillfully and with much inner confidence and resolve, wisdom, and practical advice throughout the years expertly and effectively performed roles of teacher, advisor, supporter, sustainer, motivator, and guide. I'll sorely miss not being able to speak with her and receive her wisdom and advice on this Earth again. However, I have been well-prepared, by both parents, to walk my life upon a firm foundation, which they helped build, and to reflect their love to others as best I can.

In his reflection, Brian well-described and perfectly summarized Mom's character in the phrase "...loving, caring, compassionate and always humble and kind," someone who did not "...judge people without looking at their actions," and always a "...life-long learner." However, at times, Mom could also be stern, demanding, and unwavering but within a consistent, spiritually-grounded, moral, and well-informed framework of thought. If you ever got to this point, her arguments were typically unassailable (and very instructive). Brian referred to this part of her behavior as well.

Our cousin Jean, when referring to our parents, remarked "You, their children, and your families have been so blessed to have shared your lives with them from day one." This insight is so true and further illustrates the reach and positive impact that our parents had into and on the lives of others. I can only try my best to follow their example of unselfish, caring living. Their high bar, forged from faith and much prayer, illuminates the goal ahead of me - they were always challenging us children to soar to our highest possible height: "your aim the sky, your goal the stars." It's unlikely that I will ever reach that goal line, but I can certainly give it the old "college try." Jean also mentioned how Mom could impart strength and hope to others in need, that "she was truly one of God's angels here on Earth," and "what a joyous celebration there is [now] in Heaven!" With that introduction, I can now attest that the "joyous celebration" has indeed occurred and can share with you a description of what was shown to me.

THE VISION

I entered a mostly dimly lit room or space, without color (only gray tones), with individuals seated at bare folding tables, without cover, having surfaces of worn, tannish-brown, unstained wood - the type of general-use table often seen in old assembly halls. The individuals, generally with hands folded in front of them, were either staring straight ahead or had heads bowed looking down at the table top. Their faces showed no expression. No sign of joy, happiness, anger, sadness, pain, worry, or grief - only blank, emotionless stares. Based on their facial features, my immediate impression was that these were all Polish people, but I did not recognize anyone. A couple of people briefly glanced up or looked toward me when I entered the room but did not otherwise acknowledge me. They soon returned to their original postures. These people were primarily seated in the left side of the room, mainly in the foreground - I had no clear visibility into the area of the more distant, left background. At a row of tables in the right foreground of this space sat a single person. I did not recognize this person but thought to myself that I should know him. So, I vigorously shook him to arouse him from his stupor and said "I'm sorry, but I don't recall your name. Could you please tell me your name?" He immediately became very animated, almost shouting at me, apparently trying very hard to communicate with me. However, all that I heard were loud, garbled sounds, which I didn't recognize in tone as any language that I've ever heard. Consequently, I couldn't understand what he was trying to tell me. Once he realized that his effort was futile, he stopped "talking" and returned to his stupor.

Then, I glanced up and beyond this person to the space's right background, i.e., the upper right quadrant of the room. In contrast to the dim, grayish tone elsewhere within this room, this place was lit with a bright, white light and had color. The people here were having a party! There was a dance floor, with dancers holding each others extended hands, front-to-back, forming a closed circle. They were quickly running around and around together in this circle on the dance floor. In the front and to the left side of the dance floor were others seated in folding chairs, mostly oriented with their backs facing toward me. Since I was looking at the dance party from a distance and into a bright light, I couldn't discern detail, only the basic, human form and rapid motion of the dancers. Then, all of a sudden, the dance rotation briefly slowed down and the faces of two dancers, separated from one another by another dancer, were enlarged and projected directly at me. Their faces were clearly detailed and instantly recognizable - Mom and Dad! Mom was ahead of Dad in the direction of motion of the dance line. They were SMILING, LAUGHING and having a GREAT TIME running around in the dance circle, glancing back-and-forth toward each other! After another full dance rotation, their faces were again projected toward me, less magnified this time, but still clearly recognizable as Mom and Dad - still LAUGHING and ENJOYING THE PARTY! At no time did Mom or Dad look toward me, instead their gaze was always directed along the dance circle. Afterward, Mom and Dad's faces were not projected toward me, and all that I could see from a distance was the rapid, circular motion of the dancers within this brightly lit, colorful region.

I thought to myself, well Mom and Dad are enjoying a good time! Since I was satisfied with what I had seen and now not observing anything new, I turned my attention away from the dance party and toward the others in the dull, dimly lit area of this room. I went around to a few tables, trying to engage someone. But, there was no interaction. Then the dream/vision ended and I woke up. I found myself at peace.

My impression was that I was witnessing people in two different realms. Although the setting appeared to be one space, the more distant brightly lit area in the upper right also seemed detached, slightly remote, and somewhat unconnected to the main room that I was in with the others. Although I was given brief visibility into the dance party, I also got the sense that the party goers could not see me. No one from that area ever looked toward me, including Mom and Dad. I also sensed that the sullen, expressionless Polish people in the dimly lit, grayish area would like to join the dance party but weren't able to.

FINAL THOUGHTS

So, Jean was right. There was a joyous celebration in Heaven when Mom arrived, and Dad is very happy too! Kathy had seen a foreshadowing of Dad's joy a day or two before Mom passed away, obviously unaware of what was soon going to happen. I believe that Kathy and I were blessed to receive messages from Heaven.

Amidst all the turmoil, chaos, sadness, and complexity of life here on Earth, there are only two things that really matter: (1) the promise of Christ's redemptive sacrifice and resurrection - the promise of eternal life and (2) receipt of God's Divine Mercy and forgiveness, enabling us to join our Creator in Heaven and experience everlasting joy and peace, provided that we are worthy to accept His invitation. That's our hope.

"Pray for us, Holy Mother of God, that we may be found worthy of the promises of Christ."






Brian Kwarta

Posted at 09:17am
My mom was like an onion – lots of layers, some visible, some hidden and private. She wore her outer most layer proudly. She was a faithful loving Polish catholic. But she was a strong woman, compassionate, loving, sensible, she loved to learn, loved to talk, loved to help others, loving, caring, compassionate and always humble and kind. We’ll go into each of these in a bit. But she was first a loving wife, having meet the love of her life in Amsterdam NY after moving from Haverhill MA as a teen ager.

She was truly thankful for the love of the US accepting her parents and grandparents in open arms and imminent. And she knew the poverty and struggles for food as she was on government assistance, her mother was a maid and house cleaner and they had little. She told me a story once of the joy she received a hand me down bicycle from a neighbor for her, and the threat of the social worker to stop providing food money, as the social worker insisted my grandparents must have inappropriately used the money to buy a bike instead of food.

This leads me to “perceptions”. How many times do you see a person speeding and say – what a jerk, well, they very well can be, but a story I once heard in Catholic school said – you just never know, they may be racing to an emergency, so don’t “assume”.

We talked about why would a priest abuse people, and she would reply, priests are men, and sinned. Men makes mistakes, don’t blame God. Mom lived with deep faith and a loving and realistic compassionate and caring manner.

Babcia did not assume and judge people without looking at their actions. She would call out people who misappropriate religion for their own selfish purposes – Cults, religious fanatics, leaders of state and religious leaders. Babcia was all about loving, caring and treating people kind and with respect. She was proud and thankful to her grandparents that immigrated from Poland. If you ever had the chance to talk about the behaviors’ of people that used religion as a way to oppress people, or use it for their own selfish purposes, and you truly listened to my moms reasons, you would be blessed. She was grounded and consistent in how people should love, care and respect one another – as one of Gods most important teaching is to treat each other as you would want to be treated. If you lived by this philosophy, I think the world would be in a much better place.

Careful what and how you speak, you can’t put the words back – reminds me of another children’s sermon at Baptist/Methodist church where the pastor sprayed some shaving cream out, for the kids to shave, and then said, oh—I forgot, you don’t shave yet, lets just put the shaving cream back into the can --- well, of course you can’t, which is like words and deeds – once you’ve said something, you can’t take it back. If you know me, you know I never swear – why swear?, if has no supporting and helpful value, and you can’t take it back. I choose other words, and that’s my mom. Mom would listen to your argument, and then provide a very reasoned and sensible remark, and if you are smart enough to truly listen, you may learn something.

Now let’s move along to our phone calls. My gosh, when we were growing up, my mom would have her head slanted as she held the phone against her shoulder and talk for hours at the kitchen table while she pulled fat off the meat and prepared supper. So, when I grew up, I always wondered why most of the time when we talked, I had to initiate the call. She said she didn’t want to bother me, and that I should call her. Well, I would call, just to talk, or ask for help. Then after we hung up, 2 minutes later I’d get a return call because she thought of something else. This return call was the half of the calls I would get from her. The other 50% of calls I received from Mom was always urgent call – super urgent --- they went like this..
Me: Hello
Mom: Are you watching WXXI, there’s a great show on …..
you name it, hurricanes, volcanos, space, anything Nova. She loved WXXI, and she loved learning. She was a life-long learner and the technology impressed her and excited her. She was amazed at how technology changed in her life time. She loved technology. But was also scared of it. She was worried she’d break the computer, and she could never remember those darn fangled passwords – why does google want my password – is it a computer virus? I’ll miss these frustrating technical talks with my mom.

But mom was trying to push technology on my Dad. Mom pushed my Dad to finally give up doing taxes by hand. OMG, until 2014 Dad would still manually write down all the investments in schedule A and do all the work books manually with pen and paper. Mom finally got him to let her take the documents to a tax accountant. This helped, but my mom horded all the receipts, statements and documents and take a huge pile of papers to the tax accountant. They must have shuttered when she’d walk in with the Wegmans bag full of papers. This went on until 2018 when Mom FINALLY accepted my help. After years of begging and telling her how easy it is with Turbo tax, she let me help her learn how organize her pile into a few important documents. The tax accountant was soooo happy, and this year, [2019 taxes], my mom had mostly organized it all by herself. She was slowly but surely getting it. We even did the on-line census together over the phone two weeks ago. It took us 1 hour to do the 10 minute survey, me on my mac and her on the tablet, but we did it. She loved posting cute pictures in facebook to all her grandkids special events.

Now back to WXXI, I’m listening to Pink Floyd, “Live in Venice” as I type this. Why, because when we talked a few weeks back, I was listening to WXXI when they were playing it, and I told her how good it was if she listened to the words, they were motivational. Like “time lyrics”
Ticking away the moments that make up a dull day
You fritter and waste the hours in an off-hand way
Kicking around on a piece of ground in your home town
Waiting for someone or something to show you the way
She said … all I hear is blah blah blah… But, she must have donated more money to WXXI and ordered the CD for me. As always she thinks of others. Kathy found the CD with my name on it in the house. Mom, thanks, you are so thoughtful.

This is the one of the two times in the year that my mother loved. Christmas was important, Jesus’s Birth, Wigilia – the night before Christmas was historic, Opłatek "Christmas wafer" was given and taken, Buka, Pierogi, were eaten. It was a great family time. But Easter time was her favorite time of year. Easter – The passion, and resurrection of Jesus, Dingus day, Easter lilies and Marriage – the week after Easter in 1957 - April 27, 63 years ago was when mom and dad wed. She loved dad so much, she loved her children and grandchildren that of course would not have come about if not for Easter time, and the wedding in 1957.

Babcia was so instrumental in my life and my children’s lives. She was always there to watch the kids on school breaks, illnesses, road trips and Taught my kids – Mom and Dad would attend Soccer games for 21 years from Bethany in Kindergarten until Brielle Graduated from Houghton, They went to wrestling matches, volley ball games, diving events, lacrosse games, concerts, plays, a-Capella’s, chorus’s, church choir songs. You name it, Mom and Dad came were an integral part of Bethany, Bradley and Brielle’s lives. I am so grateful to Babcia and Dziadziu for all they have given to our family. We will miss them, and have fond memories of them.

Because of my mom’s hard upbringing, she was thrifty, why of course would God allow man to create cereal boxes if not to be used for wrapping a birthday present inside. The present would fit so good inside a candy bar box, that you’d have to hid that box inside a cereal box so that one wouldn’t know the actual size of the gift. She would wear a pair of shoes until the soles fell off. This was being grateful for what she had – yes, maybe a bit to the extreme, but still, she was humble and kind. God doesn’t care what you wear, only that you are a loving and caring person

Now, Last but not least …. Beets – uggh, a life long struggle. Let me just say that I hated beets, they made me physically sick. When I was forced to eat beets, I would try, but I'd throw up. Babcia could not understand why anyone would not love beets. So, it became a fun game where she would bring a different flavor beet food, and I’d get her some other various food in a swap. I don’t think I could ever eat the cold beet soup that made me sick when I was young, but beet flavored potato chips, well, I actually like them.

I’ll remember all these things and more of mom. As I said in the beginning, My mom was like an onion – lots of layers. A faithful loving Polish catholic. A strong woman, compassionate, loving, sensible, loved to learn, loved to talk, loved to help others, loving, caring, compassionate
and always, always humble and kind.
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